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Falling for the Foster Mom Page 13
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It was all Simon could talk about since Matt had told him the news. He’d been clear to point out Maisie would be his but Simon could help out.
‘Yes, we’ll take her for walks and make sure she gets plenty of exercise when Matt’s not here.’ It was something she was looking forward to too. It would get them both outdoors more and be a step towards his recovery if the dog had his attention rather than the people around him. All thanks to Matt.
‘I’ll take a quick look at the garden to make sure it’s safe and secure for Maisie but I don’t think we’ll have any problems giving the adoption the green light.’ The lady who held Maisie’s future in the palm of her hand gave a thumbs up before she ventured outside.
Quinn breathed a sigh of relief and left Matt to deal with any last-minute details with the inspector. If the process for adopting children was as straightforward it would have made life a lot easier for Simon. He might have found a family and settled down a long time ago if he hadn’t been caught up in the bureaucracy for so long. Although that would’ve meant she’d never have got to meet him, and no matter what hardships they’d endured so far, she couldn’t imagine being without him. Evidently she wasn’t able to keep her emotions out of any relationship.
For someone who’d only ever meant to provide a safe and loving home for children until they’d found their adoptive families, she’d managed to fall for Simon and Matt along the way. They’d saved her at a time when she’d been at her loneliest. Now she knew how it was to be part of a family, however accidental, however dysfunctional, her life was never going to be the same without either of them. Regardless of what the future held, this was the most content she’d ever been and she’d learned never to take that for granted.
Happiness had come late in her childhood, infrequently in her adulthood, and was something she intended to make the most of for however long she was able to give and receive it.
‘I don’t think that could’ve gone any better. It won’t be long before we hear that pitter-patter of little feet around here.’ Matt was every inch the proud new adoptive dad when he returned.
Quinn would be lying if she said she didn’t experience a pang of longing for a man who’d feel that way about children. In an ideal world Matt would be as joyful about the prospect of adding foster children to his family as he was about the dog. Maybe if she had a partner like that to support her she might’ve found the strength to adopt Simon herself, confident she could give him a more stable life than the one his neglectful parents had provided.
‘I should go back. It’s not fair on Simon, or Mrs Johns, to make a habit of this.’
‘Twice isn’t a habit. It’s simply making the most of a good thing.’ He advanced towards her with a hunger in his eyes that made her pulse quicken as fever took hold of her body.
This was the first time they’d been truly alone with no outside distraction from the simmering sexual attraction and no reason to stop it bubbling over.
‘So, it’s okay to do something naughty twice without having to worry it’s the wrong thing?’ She took a step forward to meet him, resting her hands on his chest, desperate to make body contact again.
‘Definitely. Especially if you didn’t technically do it first time around.’ He teased her lips with the breath of innuendo, leaving her trembling with anticipation.
‘If you say so—’ She plucked the top button of his shirt open, ready to get the party started once and for all. They mightn’t ever get the chance to do this again and then she really would have regrets. She’d had a sample of how good they could be together and not following it up seemed more idiotic than taking the risk.
If Simon wasn’t in the picture she wouldn’t hesitate to give herself to Matt and when this was over the only consolation she’d have was that she’d been true to herself.
‘I do.’ His mouth was suddenly crushing hers, the force of his passion hard and fast enough to make her head spin.
She trembled from the sheer intensity of the embrace as he pulled her close. Her knees went completely from under her as Matt swept her up into his arms, her squeal of surprise quietened by his primitive growl. She clung tightly to him, her hands around his neck, her mouth still meshed to his, afraid to break contact in case she started overthinking this again. When he was touching her it was all that mattered.
He strode down the hallway and she heard the heavy thud as he kicked the bedroom door open to carry her inside. She’d never gone for macho displays but, somehow, knowing the usually unflappable Matt was so impatient to get her to bed was the greatest turn-on ever.
He booted the door shut behind them again, ensuring they were completely cut off from the rest of the world. There was just her, Matt and a bed built for two.
They fell onto the mattress together, each pulling at the other’s clothes until they were naked with no barriers left between them. They’d had weeks of foreplay, months if she counted all of those arguments at the hospital, and she didn’t want to wait any longer.
She was slick with desire as they rolled across the bed in a tangle of limbs and kisses. Once Matt had sheathed himself in a condom he grabbed from his night stand, he thrust inside her. His hardness found her centre so confidently and securely she knew she’d found her peace.
Matt had finally lost his control, yet joining with Quinn brought him more relief than fear. He’d been strong for too long, trying to do the right thing by everyone when his body had been crying out for this. For Quinn.
He moved slowly inside her at first, testing what little there was left of his restraint, luxuriating in her tight, wet heat. She was a prize he knew he didn’t deserve and one he’d only have possession of for a very short time. Quinn was her own woman who wouldn’t be so easily swayed by great sex. It would soon become clear he didn’t have anything else to bring to the party. If she expected anything more he’d only leave her with extra scars to deal with.
Quinn tightened her grip around his shaft to remind him this wasn’t a time for inner reflection and stole the remnants of his control. As much as he wanted to pour inside her he also wanted this to be something she wouldn’t regret. This should be a positive experience they could both look back on fondly, not a lapse of judgement they’d come to resent.
They’d gone into this fully aware this wasn’t the beginning of some epic love story. No matter how he felt about her this couldn’t be about anything more than sex. He could never say he loved her out loud; that would place too much pressure on him to act on it when it wasn’t a possibility. He wasn’t about to turn his life upside down again for the sake of three little words.
She ground her hips against him, demanding he show her instead. Carnal instinct soon took over from logical thinking as he sought some resolution for them both.
His strokes became quicker with Quinn’s mews of pleasure soon matching the new tempo. He captured her moans with a kiss, driving his tongue into her mouth so he had her completely anchored to him. She didn’t shy away from his lustful invasion but welcomed it, wrapping her legs around his back to hold him in place.
Matt’s breath became increasingly unsteady as he fought off the wave of final ecstasy threatening to break. Only when Quinn found her release would he submit to his own.
He gripped her hips and slammed deep inside her. Once, twice, three times—he withdrew and repeated the rhythm. The white noise was building in his head, his muscles beginning to tremble as his climax drew ever nearer.
Quinn lifted her head from the pillows, her panting breath giving way to her cries of ultimate pleasure and he answered her call with one of his own. His body shook with all-encompassing relief as he gave himself completely to her. For that brief moment he experienced pure joy and imagined how it would be to have this feeling last. Making love to someone he was actually in love with was a game changer. He couldn’t picture sharing his bed with anyone else again and that scared him h
alf to death. The other half was willing to repeat the same mistake all over again.
He disposed of the condom and rolled onto the bed beside her, face first into the mattress, content to die here of exhaustion instead of having to get up again and face reality.
‘What do we do now?’ Quinn turned onto her side so he had a very nice view of her pert breasts.
‘Try and breathe,’ he said, unable to resist reaching out to cup her in his hand even through his exhaustion.
‘I mean after that.’
He knew exactly what she meant but he didn’t have the answer. At least, probably not the one she wanted to hear. She wanted to know what happened now they’d finally succumbed to the chemistry, to their feelings, but for him he couldn’t let it change anything.
To enter into a full-blown relationship with Quinn entailed having one with Simon too. One which went beyond professional or friendship. He couldn’t do that in good conscience when he could never be the father Simon needed. He wouldn’t give him any more false hope.
He was done with the school runs, the birthday parties and the angsty teenage rebellion stage. Whilst he didn’t regret being the sole provider for his sisters, he was too jaded and tired to go through it all again.
Yet, he was advancing ever further towards the vacancy.
‘You’re fostering Simon, right? Someday he’ll be adopted and you’ll start the process over with someone new?’
‘Well...yes. The children are only placed temporarily in my care until a family can be found for them.’ Quinn frowned at him and he could tell the idea of not having the boy around was already becoming a touchy subject. They’d both got in over their heads but Matt was determined he, at least, was going to keep swimming against the tide.
‘What if we apply the same restriction to our relationship?’ It was the only logical way this could continue without any one of them coming to serious harm.
‘You want me to foster you too?’ Quinn danced the flat of her hand down his back, over the curve of his backside and across his thigh until he was back to full fighting strength and falling for her blatant attempt to leave this discussion for another time.
‘More of a co-dependency until you’ve found your for ever family too.’ In his heart he couldn’t let it go on once Simon left her. There could never be a future for them as a couple because there would always be a child in need and Quinn’s heart was too open to deny anyone the love they craved.
It wouldn’t be fair to stop her simply because his heart was closed for business.
She sighed next to him, the heavy resignation of the situation coming from deep within a soul still searching for its mate. It was too bad it couldn’t be him, then his own wouldn’t be howling at the injustice he was doing to it.
‘I’m beginning to think that’s an impossible dream.’
‘You’re a great foster mother, a beautiful woman and an incredible lover.’ He traced his thumb across her lips, hating they were talking about the next man who’d get to kiss them.
‘Yeah?’ She coquettishly accepted his compliment and he was in danger of digging a hole in the mattress as his libido decided they should make the most of their time together in bed.
‘Yeah, and I think we should make a few more memories so I never forget.’ Not that it was likely.
Quinn was the one woman, other than his sisters, who’d ever truly touched his heart and gave his life more meaning simply by being in it. The same probably couldn’t be said about him when he’d only be able to give her fun and sex at a time when she needed stability. When she looked back she’d see they’d muddled personal feelings with the intensity of Simon’s treatment. What he didn’t want was for her to end up hating him for taking advantage of her. If they kept it light, kept it fun, kept it physical, there’d be no need to get into the heavy emotional stuff he had no room for any more.
He threw an arm across Quinn and rolled onto his back, bringing her with him so she straddled his thighs. With her sex pressed against his, the logical side of his brain finally shut up.
Quinn wasn’t stupid. Sex was Matt’s way of avoiding deep and meaningful conversation. She didn’t blame him. Nothing good was going to come of them in their case. When Simon left, so would he, if not sooner. At some point in the near future they’d both be gone, leaving nothing but memories and a void in her heart. It was much easier to take pleasure where she could find it in the here and now than face the prospect of that pain. She’d rather have this kind of procrastination than ugly crying over bridal magazines for a relationship that would never happen.
For every fake idyll that popped into her head of her and Matt and their foster brood, she ground her hips against him to block it out. The rush of arousal instantly channelled her thoughts to those of self-pleasure instead of an impossible dream.
With her hands braced on Matt’s sturdy chest, she rocked back and forth. His arousal strengthened as she slid along his length so she took him in hand and guided him into her slick entrance, giving them both what they craved for now. They fit perfectly, snug, as if they’d both found their other halves.
Matt was watching her, his eyes hooded with desire, but this time he was letting her make all the moves. Only thinking of herself for once, taking what she wanted, was kind of liberating. With a firm hand she teased the tip of his shaft along her folds until she was aching to have him inside her again. She anchored herself to him and that blessed relief soon gave way to a new need. Every circular motion of her hips brought another gasp of self-pleasure and a step closer to blinding bliss.
She doubled over, riding out the first shudders of impending climax. Matt sat up to capture one of her nipples with his mouth and sucked hard until it blurred the pleasure and pain barriers. Her orgasm came quickly and consumed her from the inside out, leaving her body weak from the strength of it.
Matt held her in place as he thrust upwards, finally taking his own satisfaction. Each time his hungry mouth found her breast or his deft fingers sought to please her again, another aftershock rippled through her. Only when she felt him tense beneath her, his grip on her tighten and the roar of his triumph ring in her ears did she finally let exhaustion claim her.
‘That was...unexpected. Great, just...unexpected.’
As much for her as it was for him. She didn’t recall ever being that confident in the bedroom before.
‘I’m full of surprises, me.’ She gave him a sly smile and hoped now he saw her as much more than a fragile foster mum he didn’t want to be lumbered with for the rest of his days. There was still a sexy, independent-thinking, fun-loving woman inside her. She just hoped he assumed it was her husky voice he was hearing and not the raw-throated mutterings of a girl brought to the edge of tears by great sex.
He slung his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. She didn’t know how long they’d been locked away in this room, in their own world of fire and passion where time didn’t matter. There was that residual parental guilt that perhaps she’d spent too long indulging her own needs while neglecting her son’s but the warmth of Matt’s skin against hers and the steady rhythm of his heart beating beneath her ear soon convinced her to stay here for a while longer. Simon was safe, and in Matt’s arms, so was she.
‘We’ll pick Simon up once we’ve had a rest,’ he mumbled into her hair.
Without prompting, Matt had raised the matter, something she’d been hesitant to do in case she ruined the moment. Her last thought as she drifted off to sleep was a happy one.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
‘CAN I WALK HER? Please?’ Simon hovered between Quinn and Matt, eyeing the dog’s lead as if it was the hottest toy of the year.
Quinn glanced at Maisie’s official owner for confirmation it was okay even though she and Simon walked her in the park practically every day.
‘Sure.’ Matt handed over control without a
second thought. It was that kind of trust between him and Simon which was helping to build up the boy’s confidence. That, and a hyperactive dog which kept them all too busy to dwell on any unpleasantness.
They’d fallen into a new routine, one which included exercising the dog and therefore getting Simon out and about in between hospital visits. Dare she say it, things had begun to settle down and they had so much going on now Simon’s scars no longer seemed to be their main focus. Especially when those on his face were slowly beginning to fade.
As well as their dog-sitting duties, Quinn had the hospital committee meetings to attend and Simon was working towards his return to school. There’d been a phased return to classes held in the nearby hall, and although he’d been nervous, it had helped that some of his classmates were still being treated for minor injuries, including some burns. They understood what had happened to alter his appearance better than most but it didn’t stop Quinn worrying.
‘Hold on tight to Maisie’s lead and don’t go too far ahead,’ she shouted after the enthusiastic duo haring through the park, although the sound of happy barking and childish laughter was music to her ears.
‘They’ll be grand. With any luck they’ll tire each other out.’ Matt cemented his place as the laid-back half of the partnership content to hang back and let the duo explore the wide open space, whist she remained the resident worrywart.
‘Getting that dog was the best decision we could have made.’ She knew pets were sometimes used as therapy for patients but she hadn’t expected such impressive results so quickly. Simon was finally coming out of the shadows back into the light.
‘Not the best decision.’
Quinn gave a yelp as he yanked her by the arm behind a nearby tree. He quietened her protest with his mouth. The kiss, full of want and demanding at first, soon softened, making her a slave to his touch. Okay, taking that long-awaited step into the bedroom had been one of the highlights of her year, perhaps even her lifetime. That in itself caused her more problems, as once would never be enough.